Disagreements; why do they occur? And the solutions (Islamic Marriage Solutions)

1)      Misunderstanding each other – probably half of the time (as spouses) we misunderstand each other.

Solution – First of all, we need to be attentive when our spouse is speaking to us. If we did not understand something politely ask for clarifications.

2)      Not allowing each other to put their point across – finishing off their sentences, or explaining their thought processes and opinions – because we think we know what they are about to say so, we just don’t give them a chance.

Solution – Hold your horses (as they say), we seriously need to give each other a chance to put their point across. Let them have a chance to speak, then ponder and reflect upon what they have said.

3)      Holding on to grudges – this is difficult and we may find it hard forgetting about, which is understandable.

Solution – you are not going anywhere if you’re holding a grudge. However, it is easier to let go off a grudge after speaking about it.

4)      Looking at the issue from only ones own perspective – and not seeing things from the other person’s perspective.

Solution – you need to understand what the other person is trying to put across to you. As they say, ‘put yourselves in their shoes.’

Due to every individual being different, disagreements will naturally occur from small to major issues.

In a partnership like marriage ‘agreeing to disagree’ is a key code to follow. Meeting in the middle and compromising may be the most challenging task within a marriage but learning to master it will only lead to a successful union.

Furthermore, if we know and understand that disagreeing will occur perhaps every now and then, then surely we are mature enough to handle these situations in the best possible manner, if they arise.

6^th January 2019

Fozrul Khan

Islamic Marriage Solutions